Southern California InFocus - Letters to the Editor

July 08

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By Roqaya Ashmawey

‘A few good men’ draws response
In response to last month’s article, "A Few Good Men: American Muslim Women Bemoan Lack of Good Male Suitors" by Sondos Kholoki-Kahf, I must express my gratitude for reporting about this unfortunate scenario experienced by many American Muslims, both male and female. Personally, as a male Muslim, I feel as if I need to marry quickly as well, knowing that women often do get "marriage fever" and marry early on in life. I’d like to marry someone close to my age for the sake of compatibility and for our future together. Therefore, as I get older, the chance of me finding a woman gets slimmer as they tend to marry for the sake of avoiding a "lifetime of loneliness," as the author put it. The search for the right spouse falls on both male and female shoulders. I’m sure women have a harder time, but I’ve had my share of troubles, too. Like Afaf, I find that they are either too Muslim, or not Muslim enough. However, I do commend her as well as any other Muslim women who do not sacrifice their goals for the sake of marriage. Rushing into a marriage with such a mentality spells disaster, and often leads to an unhappy marriage, which is another topic within the Muslim community altogether.

Omar Jaber
Brooklyn, N.Y.

There are a lot of good guys out there, it’s just that all odds are against young Muslims who want to get married. The community doesn’t encourage it, families being too cultural, and families being too materialistic/demanding. The marriage scene has become something it shouldn’t be, and the ones paying the price are us (guys) and of course the sisters. In a nutshell, there are plenty of "good" men.

Mohamed S.
Anaheim, Calif.

I saw the article about Muslim women in the states complaining about a lack of good suitors. These sisters are contradicting themselves. They want a practicing brother- but he should practice how they feel Islam should be practiced - that’s the problem. There’s no two ways about it - a woman’s place is at home - except for certain circumstances. We cannot justify women/girls working or taking up further studies/working in dangerous (for their Iman) environments unnecessarily. Nobody is perfect, but please don’t justify our actions - just ask Allah to give us the taufeeq to practice how we ought to and be the examples to society that we should be. Do you honestly think that Prophet Muhammad would be pleased to see all these things if he were to come into our midst now? The way we practice Islam? Our biased/skewed interpretations of gender equality, our unwillingness to accept what we know is right - just because all our friends and the rest of society are all doing it? What difference does it make if its 2008 or 1008?

Mohammed Saleem Moorad
Durban, South Africa

Editor’s Note: Our June cover story, "A Few Good Men," continues to generate much conversation, so much so that a townhall discussion has been scheduled on Aug 8. in Anaheim. (See page 33.) The article was about common perspectives from an American Muslim woman’s point of view. Responses to the article have varied from "brave" to "glad to see the topic finally addressed" to women need to quit "whining." InFocus will present common views among American Muslim men in our next issue. If you would like to speak on the record for the next article on the topic of the struggle for American Muslims to find a suitable spouse, contact InFocus now.

Health article may be misleading
The June 2008 article "Check food labels for a healthier you" may mislead consumers about high fructose corn syrup. High fructose corn syrup, sugar and several fruit juices all contain the same simple sugars. New research continues to confirm that high fructose corn syrup is safe and no different from other common sweeteners like sugar and honey. High fructose corn syrup has the same number of calories as sugar. The U.S. Food and Drug Administration granted high fructose corn syrup "Generally Recognized as Safe" status for use in food, and reaffirmed that ruling in 1996 after thorough review. High fructose corn syrup offers numerous benefits, too. It keeps foods fresh. It enhances fruit and spice flavors. It retains moisture in bran cereals and helps keep breakfast bars moist. Consumers can see the latest research and learn more at www.HFCSfacts.com.

Audrae Erickson
President, Corn Refiners Association
Washington, D.C.

L.A. mayor owes explanation
I truly appreciate the leadership Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa has provided to the city of Los Angeles and it’s people while preparing us for the challenges ahead. However his recent trip to Israel has gotten many of us concerned. The purpose of his trip focused around airport security. But of all the places in the world where great standards for secure airports exist, many wonder why he chose Israel as the prototypical example. Many Americans, American Muslims or Palestinian Americans that travel to Israel are routinely subject to unnecessary harassment, interrogations or extended background checks. And now at a time when we are still reeling from the effects of those horrible reports from LAPD’s Muslim mapping program, the mayor’s office seems to be opening another chapter of potential heightened discrimination against his Muslim constituents. The Israeli security services’ model seems more concerned with dehumanizing, harassing, embarrassing and manipulating individuals than securing as reflected in the experience of many that have travelled through that country. I don’t believe that such a model would be ideal for the great city of Los Angeles. I sincerely hope that Mr. Villaraigosa and his advisors change their outlook on this issue and work with any number of advanced organizations ranging from Zurich to London airports that have done a marvelous job of maintaining security and continue to welcome people from all walks of life, including from the Muslim world. Their tourism and cultural industries are thriving as a result.

Faisal Qazi, DO
Chino Hills, Calif.

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