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Facebook users, here's what you should know |
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By Tasbeeh Herwees, IFN Columnist
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Tuesday, 12 January 2010 |
There are 350 million people on Facebook. And theoretically, for a small window of time last week when Facebook pulled a fast one on all its users and changed its privacy settings to encourage “openness,” those 350 million people were privy to all the lurid details of your life. Your status updates, photos, personal information, where you live, what music you listen to, who your friends with - all available to every creep and potential boss to analyze and use against you.
A Facebook user since middle school, I can’t count the number of times I’ve written or posted something only to regret - and delete - it later. But if experience has taught me anything, it’s this: deleting something you’ve posted on the Internet doesn’t mean it was never there. If prior restraint was ever something I encouraged, it would be in this situation. Like a cousin of mine often says, “We all make mistakes. But why make those mistakes public to everyone you know?”
Here are a couple of good rules to follow if you’re a Facebook user:
Don’t post photos you won’t also post on the bulletin board at your respective mosques. Words may be misinterpreted, but it’s hard to argue against a photo, especially one taken out of context. Posting a photo of an empty beer bottle, for example, could be misleading. To those who know you, it may be an ironic statement on Muslims and drinking. But to anyone else, it sends a different message that you either surround yourself with people who drink or, God forbid, take part in it yourself. Ask yourself - is this something I’d allow to be posted at the masjid? If the answer is no, then it’s likely you shouldn’t be posting it.
If someone posts an inappropriate photo of you, don’t be embarrassed to demand that they remove it. Ladies, I’m looking at you - sometimes people aren’t as vigilant about the photos they post of other people. If your hair or neck is showing, and you’re a hijabi, then immediately untag yourself and politely contact the poster asking them to remove it. Worst case scenario: they get annoyed but remove it anyway. A real friend would understand, and a better friend would've known not to post it in the first place.
Don’t write something you won’t also say to the sheikh or imam at your mosque. Would you use profane language in front of your sheikh? Would you tell him about that “hottie” you checked out at school? Probably not. So why do we feel so comfortable talking this way to 200 of our closest “friends?” Whether in verbal conversation or a wall post on our friend's wall, our words matter.
Don’t count on privacy settings. Just because you’ve got maximum security privacy settings on your Facebook profile doesn’t mean the only people who are seeing it are your friends. How many times have you forgotten to log out of your account on a family or school computer? It’s likely your friends have made the mistake as well. Another reason why you should never post photos on the assumption that only your friends will see them. Don't provoke others online. Online drama existed way before Facebook, but Facebook popularized it. If you have something to say to someone, cool down and then remember the three P's: be Polite, Private and do it in Person. Confronting someone over Facebook whether directly or in a passive-aggressive manner through a vague status update ("People are so fake, you know who you are!") is never a great idea. It's not even a good idea. It's the worst idea ever. Don't do it.
Renew your intentions. Why are you using Facebook in the first place? If Facebook is only a low-anxiety medium with which to talk to that cute Muslim/Muslimah, then what you post online and what you say is going to reflect that. But if you remember that Facebook is a great tool for dawah and for thikr - anyone else loving the Hadith a Day group? - and renew your intentions for that purpose, then knowing what is and isn't appropriate for the rest of the world to know is going to be a lot easier.
If no one else is, Allah's watching. Just because your friends are accepting of your behavior on Facebook, that doesn’t mean you have free reign. Allah’s always there, and He doesn’t just know what’s on your Facebook page, He knows what’s in your head.
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Last Updated ( Thursday, 29 April 2010 )
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